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Coping with the Loss of a Child


To cope with this, means to allow God to renew your mind. Let me explain...

People chase the divine healing message, and the deliverance message, but neglect the message of soundness of mind.


Paul wrote many things but one that is often overlooked is his comments on the mind.


"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7


The Holy Spirit is love because God is love. He has enormous power as seen in the creation. He also is the soundest mind in all creation and outside of it We were made in His image and therefore should demonstrate love power and soundness of mind.


There are three powerful forces here. Love. So much is preached on love and believers seek for love and appreciate it. Then he mentions power. Today the charismatic, Pentecostal, and apostolic churches have a vision regarding power. The churches are moving in love and power. But often they fall down because they neglect soundness of mind.


Soundness of mind is the opposite of fear. It is the opposite of foolishness. It is the opposite of all the negative strongholds that humanity today labors under.


Paul also describes the central position of the mind saying

"And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect will of God."

Romans 12:2


The transformation comes by renewing your mind. And as you renew your mind then you experience the fullness of God's perfect will for your life.


While your mind is fear filled, depressed, confused, feeble you will never experience His fullness. You can be full of love, full of power and be unsound in your mind and it will lead you to disaster.


"For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he" Proverbs 23:7 KJV


Paul tells us to discipline our minds to think on good and positive ideas…

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy —think about such things." Philippians 4:8 NIV


Sin is birthed out of thought

You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman.For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

Genesis 3:4‭-‬5 NIV


Eve let satanic thoughts fill her mind and fell and then communicated the same to Adam.


David was strong in the Lord and loved him and wielded his mighty power against the enemy kingdoms. However, David fell. He did this because of his mind. David had a background of rejection. When Samuel arrived to anoint a king from Jesse's sons Jesses didn't even bother to bring David to the meeting.


Then when he was sent to his brothers in the army their attitude to him was one of rejection. "You come in naughtiness of your heart …with whom did you leave those few miserable sheep?'


Later King Saul sought to kill him. He spent years in exile hiding from the king.


Eventually Israel came to him and asked him to rule them. Now he was king, but his personal emotional life was a mess. He was not confident. He was weak. He had issues with his first wife, and was not happy. He also had other wives and concubines but somehow he was not happy.


Then he saw Bathsheba naked bathing. He wanted her. This preyed on his mind until he yielded to temptation and took her. When she was pregnant he realized his imminent danger. She was a married woman. He had committed adultery.. she wouldn't say anything but he feared her husband. He ordered him back from battle hoping he would sleep with his wife. Then the baby could reasonably be his child. But Uriah did not. He left for the battle without touching his wife. David now faced serious issues.


If Uriah announced that he could not be the father as he never touched his wife Bathsheba, a married woman could be executed for adultery. If it came out David was the father he could be executed for adultery. He saw no way out. His mind took over and he made some unsound decisions. He ordered the death of Uriah. That way Bathsheba could claim Uriah slept with her when he came home and the baby was his.


It seemed like a good plan but it was not a decision made in love, power and soundness of mind. It destroyed David's life. His remedy for adultery was murder.


He was overwhelmed with guilt and depression. His basic fear of rejection compounded and he worried God would reject him. He wrote


"For I am aware of my rebellious acts; I am forever conscious of my sin. Hide your face from my sins! Wipe away all my guilt! Do not reject me! Do not take your Holy Spirit away from me!

Psalms 51:3‭, ‬9‭, ‬11 NET


David was deep in fear of rejection, by God, and it crushed him.


This man was crushed in his heart and his mind. He needed to not only receive spiritual forgiveness, but also mental freedom from guilt and regret and depression.


Isaiah prophesied the Holy Spirit would not only achieve spiritual victory but also restore mental health and soundness.





"The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion— to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

Isaiah 61:1‭-‬3 NIV


I experienced a powerful transformation when my mind was made sound by the Holy Spirit anointing.


After having two daughters we had a son. I was overjoyed. The baby grew and we all loved him. Then one afternoon he suddenly died. He was gone and we were overcome with grief. As time passed our grief remained. My soul was swallowed up by grief. Joy, happiness and contentment were gone. Everyday was a burden to carry and a dark place to live through. After two years I lost my joy and just dragged myself through the motions of living.


My child, my son, died when he was 18 months old. I was still a born again child of God. I was still forgiven, I was still saved, baptized and Spirit baptized. I was still baptized by one Spirit into the body of Christ but I no longer had joy.


My joy was gone. Mourning, grief, despair and broken heartedness engulfed me. These are part of the mind. For two years I was depressed and life was heavy to carry. Then God spoke to me.

He said "Sing, O barren, thou that didst not bear; break forth into singing, and cry aloud," Isaiah 54


I rebelled. I did not want to sing. He gently explained. "Go in your mind, in your imagination, in your memory of that day. Bring it up and sing my praises."


He reminded me of Paul's words, "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus"

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18


I began to walk through that terrible day and its events in my mind, and as I did I ground out the "Hallelujah" song. No energy, no power, just obedience. I gave thanks to God in that circumstance.


And the next day I did it again through sheer obedience and the only feeling I had was depression. On the third day suddenly my spirit stood up and began to sing in tongues! The melody of praise flowed pure free and the heaviness, the grief, the mourning, the depression and the despair rolled back. Over the next weeks I was transformed as He renewed my mind.


He explained that the baby was His and he had been lent to me and I should rejoice because I had been part of creating him, and that He was alive in Christ forever. As my mind received His light I was transformed.


My joy returned, my appreciation of my daughters, my ministry and career returned. And my faith was not only restored, but was stronger than ever.


Paul described the distinction between the mind and the spirit. The mind has understanding the spirit has God consciousness and dies not work by understanding hut by revelation.


" So what shall I do? I will pray with my spirit, but I will also pray with my understanding; I will sing with my spirit, but I will also sing with my understanding.

1 Corinthians 14:15 NIV


I started praising him with my mind and willing to obey His word. Then the anointing of the Spirit came upon me and broke depression, grief, and mourning and filled me with joy. And I began praising him with my spirit too!


He did not save me that day! I was already saved, but he transformed me by the renewing of my mind, or renewing my thinking. He broke the strongholds over my mind. Then joy came flooding in and my life experience changed. Soundness of mind now allowed me to live a normal life, to function normally and to live enjoying God's goodness and mercy.


As believers we need to pay more attention to our minds. It is in our minds that strongholds exist and we lose the victory promised to us.


For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

2 Corinthians 10:3‭-‬5 NIV


This describes the power of soundness of mind. Paul describes there is a warfare we are in. He says we can demolish strongholds of the enemy. Then he tells us how.


By demolishing arguments which means thoughts and ideas that take hold of people's minds. An example would be the worship of Diana. It was an idea embraced into a culture and embedded into the peoples' kinds.


Paul was assaulted because

not only at Ephesus, but almost throughout all Asia, this Paul hath persuaded and turned away much people, saying that they be no gods, which are made with hands: so that not only this our craft is in danger to be set at nought; but also that the temple of the great goddess Diana should be despised, and her magnificence should be destroyed, whom all Asia and the world worshiped.

Acts 19:26‭-‬27 KJV


Paul was presenting the truth of Christ to the strongholds in the peoples minds about idolatry and many were taken captive, and obeyed Christ, rejecting idols.


Then he says we take captive every THOUGHT! And make it obedient to Christ. Strongholds are built into our minds. Behavioral strongholds!


We bring those thoughts into captivity and make them obedient to Christ. Thus we are transformed. Paul wrote often about "in the past '' and then commanded a new behavior giving them a new idea that brought them to obedience.


"For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Ephesians 5:8‭-‬11 NIV


Paul tells the Colossians how to be transformed. He starts by saying…

"Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator.

Colossians 3:2‭-‬3‭, ‬5‭, ‬7‭-‬10 NIV


Here he says we are transformed by the renewing of our minds. Everything here flows from "Set your minds on things above…"


Paul shows how we can overcome sexual behaviors by renewing the mind.


"The body, however, is not meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own;

1 Corinthians 6:13‭, ‬19 (NIV)


He explains the body is not given to us to use for immorality He gives a new idea. Your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost so do not unite your body with a prostitute. Elsewhere he says to avoid immorality men should marry and in marriage partners should not deny their bodies to their spouse. He takes the minds and fills them with thoughts that are obedient to Christ and it transforms those who respond.


I encourage you to ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you how to experience transformation through the renewing of your mind. It is a true transformation that lasts.

God bless



Copyright © Simon Peter Mugridge Bishop


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